No, this is not a story of the 20th century eugenics craze in Scandinavia or some horror story from the Nazi past. It happened only a few years ago, in a newly democratic country, which should have known better.
Any woman, especially one like me who was never able to have her own children, will feel a stab of pain for those women arbitrarily denied the right to be mothers because someone else thought they knew better.
But it is worse. The status of Roma women in their community depends on their ability to become mothers. So not only did the doctors take away their right to reproduce, they robbed those women of an honoured place in their own community.
This week, a high level meeting is taking place in Strasbourg to tackle the question of the rightful place of Roma in Europe today. Sarkozy’s decision earlier this year to extradite Roma from French camps back to their place of origin has had, amongst the many sad stories of intolerance and lost opportunity, one positive result. It has made Roma the fashionable cause of the moment. And although it is easy to grumble about tokenism and “too little too late”, it will hopefully lead to an awareness of their horrible plight as the untouchables of European society.
If it is hard for the boys and men to find an education and employment, how much harder is it for the women? Many of the Roma girls marry at extremely young ages: it is not unusual for a young wife and her husband to attend school together (if indeed they are lucky enough to be accepted into formal education). This is one personal gripe I have - when I have challenged Roma groups to answer the question, they inevitable answer that the Roma children grow and develop much quicker than others. Which in itself may be true. After all, faced with the reality of grinding poverty and lack of acceptance to pursue the ”normal” route of school, college, employment, your only choices lie in facing a cold and hungry world on its own terms.
Some Roma women do escape. I have met them: amazing, powerful, determined. But these are the exceptions that escape the rule. Mostly Roma womanhood is condemned to even worse than the men. The Roma elders themselves ensure that women follow a certain path, and outside,”majority”, society does the rest.
And now comes the sermon about education. Yes, it is the key. If Roma women get places in school, they will be equipped with the skills to pursue their lives, hope for paid work, educate their children and communities in turn. If Roma society learns that marriage at the age of 12 or 13 is unhelpful, they will cease to block the development of their children and the hope of their whole of the community to turn itself around.
There is hope out there. In Spain and in Romania the authorities have looked at how to build bridges between the communities. Roma mediators - from the community itself - are making a huge difference, cajoling the Roma to bring their children to school and coaxing schools to open up. But the real difference will come when the women of Romania, the women of Spain, the women of France listen to the story of the Roma - as mothers who have known the joy of children and suffered at their loss.
Ghandi said that you could only really understand someone else once you have walked a mile in their shoes. The shoes of the Roma are worn-down, dirty, unsavoury. Let’s hope there are enough out their willing to put them on.
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